Final boss
TERMINABERS
def. TTT 211.90 to 181.00
Malik Nabers (42.1) and George Pickens (39) helped post the top score of the week. Jahmyr Gibbs (44.7) and Trey McBride (30.6) were TTT's best, which kept it respectable and nothing more.
The Drop
BDFL Week 5
Tenth place beats first place for the second week in a row
Two weeks ago they were winless, alone at the bottom and fresh off the lowest score of the season. Then they took down First Down Syndrome, the last unbeaten team in the league. This week it was TTT, the team that took over first place. Two median wins came along for the ride. They're out of the basement with nine weeks to play. The editor has given up pretending to be neutral.
Crowns collected: 2.
tap a card to flip it
Final boss
def. TTT 211.90 to 181.00
Malik Nabers (42.1) and George Pickens (39) helped post the top score of the week. Jahmyr Gibbs (44.7) and Trey McBride (30.6) were TTT's best, which kept it respectable and nothing more.
Surgery II
def. Sacks & Muffs 211.55 to 144.45
Matthew Stafford (39.15) and Garrett Wilson (32.4) backed up the jackpot. Mike Evans (35.3) and Davante Adams (27.1) did what they could for Sacks & Muffs.
KO
def. Colorado Bulldogs 199.75 to 137.80
Jaylen Warren (44.8), Parker Washington (38.4) and Bucky Irving (35.5) did the damage. Washington was last week's anchor card, so consider him refloated. Aaron Jones (23.7) was Colorado's next-best scorer, a long way back.
Upset
def. First Down Syndrome 193.00 to 140.75
Josh Allen (36.6) and Tyler Warren (28.4) backed him up. Jared Goff (37.65) and Brock Bowers (33) were First Down Syndrome's best.
Ugly W
def. Red(zone) Rockets 132.10 to 119.85
Justin Jefferson (24.8) and Braelon Allen (21.6) chipped in. Aaron Rodgers (30.35) and Jaxon Smith-Njigba (29.8) were the Rockets' top two.
pick your team
Every lineup, graded against the best one it could have started. Perfect lineups would have changed 17 results this season, 7 of them head-to-head games. This week, nobody's bench decided anything.
Raw
arrows = moves since Week 4
playoff line. velvet rope. no entry.
playoff odds, change since last week
40,000 simulated seasons, built from every team's scoring so far and pulled toward the league average. Top six make it, top two get a bye, ties go to points for.
coin-flip line
what the schedule did to you
Each week's finish, from 1st to 10th. All-play is your record if you had played all nine other teams every week. Luck is your head-to-head wins minus what all-play says you should have.
| Team | W1 | W2 | W3 | W4 | W5 | All-play | H2H | Luck |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| TTT | 5 | 5 | 1 | 5 | 5 | 29-16 | 2-3 | -1.2 wins |
| bhitt24 | 3 | 8 | 8 | 1 | 2 | 28-17 | 4-1 | +0.9 wins |
| Bidet Boys | 2 | 6 | 5 | 7 | 3 | 27-18 | 3-2 | Even |
| First Down Syndrome | 4 | 3 | 3 | 6 | 7 | 27-18 | 3-2 | Even |
| Sacks & Muffs | 1 | 2 | 6 | 8 | 6 | 27-18 | 3-2 | Even |
| Colorado Bulldogs | 7 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 8 | 27-18 | 1-4 | -2.0 wins |
| jerryjonesmonies | 10 | 7 | 4 | 9 | 4 | 16-29 | 2-3 | +0.2 wins |
| TERMINABERS | 8 | 10 | 10 | 4 | 1 | 17-28 | 2-3 | +0.1 wins |
| 21 inches soft | 6 | 9 | 9 | 3 | 9 | 14-31 | 3-2 | +1.4 wins |
| Red(zone) Rockets | 9 | 1 | 7 | 10 | 10 | 13-32 | 2-3 | +0.6 wins |
Blue: top half, wins the median.Red: bottom half.
Colorado Bulldogs. Tied for the third-best all-play record in the league and 1-4 head to head. All-play says they should have about three wins.
21 inches soft. Ninth in all-play, 3-2 head to head. Nobody has gotten more out of less.
TTT has finished exactly fifth in four of five weeks, the last spot that still wins the median. That's 5-0 against the median and 2-3 head to head, and it's good for first place.
win chances from the same 40,000 seasons
Game of the week
Pick: Sacks & Muffs
Both of these teams have held first place this season, and neither has won a result in weeks. One skid ends Sunday.
Pick: Bidet Boys
One of the Rockets' brothers co-founded this league, so this pick comes with an apology.
Pick: TTT
Madame Waiverina trusts first place about as far as she can throw it. The numbers like them anyway.
Pick: Colorado Bulldogs
The math likes the Colorado OGs. The editor has filed a formal complaint with the math.
Pick: bhitt24
The most confident call of the week. The surgeon's team is the hardest out in the league right now.
the Week 5 waiver wire
Wanted: quarterbackPaid $13 for Jacoby Brissett. Dontayvion Wicks has been let go. TERMINABERS.
BoomerangDropped TreVeyon Henderson to claim Zach Charbonnet for $13. Paid $6 to get Henderson back two days later. TERMINABERS.
Big spenderDenzel Boston for $24, the biggest bid of the week. Kyle Pitts has been shown the door. bhitt24.
Shopping spreeAaron Rodgers for $18 and T.J. Hockenson for $15. Courtland Sutton and J.K. Dobbins out. Also bid $0 on Michael Mayer, which did not work. Red(zone) Rockets.
Secondhand goodsPicked up Courtland Sutton, released by the Rockets, and Tyler Allgeier, released by First Down Syndrome. Both off the curb, both free. Colorado Bulldogs.
Rebuild in progressWill Shipley, Malik Washington and Keon Coleman in. Tyler Allgeier and Dalton Schultz out. Total spent: $0. First Down Syndrome.
Budget optionKirk Cousins for $5. Also offered $1 for C.J. Stroud and got outbid. 21 inches soft.
Tight end swapMike Gesicki in, Kenyon Sadiq out. Woody Marks for $3, Chris Godwin gone. Sacks & Muffs.
Free to good homeTyjae Spears. No replacement requested. TTT.
Closed for businessNo moves from Bidet Boys or jerryjonesmonies. Wallets remain sealed.